08/07/2018 Individual Human Beings

I sometimes get frustrated by relationship especially by someone who are really close to me. If I try to be as objective as possible, it happens because to some extend, I have some expectation towards them as a family as a partner etc and since it didn't meet so I felt disappointed.  

Every time I notice this habit pattern arising to me, I remember this beautiful quote from Khalil Gibran. 

“But let there be spaces in your togetherness and let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.”

Whether good or bad, we are all alone at the end and we want to be completely okay and happy to be alone. You want to work on to be independent and successful as a human being first. It doesn't mean you become selfish. It is selfish if you try to depend on someone without making any effort. Becoming independent doesn't prevent you from building strong and beautiful relationships. You will become even happier and your life may become more fruitful and colorful than ever. You'll be able to grow stronger team.

It is just risky to rely on someone for your happiness. Your parents won't be able to support you until you die. Your partner cannot make you keep feeling happy if your desire is "if I become xxx then I will be happy" or "if this person does this, all the issues will be gone". We want to have a mentality of supporting each other instead of relying each other.

The best option I come up in mind is to live your life as if you don't have anyone with you. You will have to change your perspective to shift your disappointment or anger to yourself then ask how we can constructively address our behaviors. 

You can notice and confront the root cause of this unpleasant sensation. It is not easy at all but it will lead you to genuine happiness. Let's work on this step by step :)

Thank you for spending your time to read this.